


Heaven

by iolanthe_rosa



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-04-25
Updated: 2003-04-25
Packaged: 2017-11-19 11:08:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/572609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iolanthe_rosa/pseuds/iolanthe_rosa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was inspired by the quote from Billy Boyd: "That's the thing about Elijah. He's got the biggest eyes you've ever seen, but they don't work."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heaven

"Forget that reincarnation shit," Elijah said. "When I die, I'm going to Heaven. Cut right to the chase, you know?"   
  
Instead of falling back to sleep as usual after lovemaking, Elijah and Dom found themselves having one of those lazy, philosophical, post-coital conversations in the dark.  
  
"Last time I checked they weren't letting smoking, drinking, swearing gay boys into Heaven," Dom answered.  
  
"Well, in _my_ Heaven, those are the _criteria_ for getting in. But the point is, I'm not coming back as anyone else."  
  
"How do you know you won't? Dom asked.  
  
"How do you know you _will_? Elijah countered.  
  
"I just know."  
  
A pause.  
  
"Have you thought about what Heaven is like?" Elijah asked.  
  
Dom ran his hand lightly along the soft contours of Elijah's body, letting it come to rest on the swale of Elijah's waist, where it rose to meet his hip. "Mmm, yeah. I can imagine. Not going there, though. I'm coming back."  
  
"No, you're not. You're going to be in Heaven with me."  
  
"I don't know, Lijah. I really plan to come back. But go ahead: tell me what this Heaven of yours is like. Maybe I can be persuaded."  
  
Elijah rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. Dom's hand rested now on Elijah's warm stomach. A curl of coarse pubic hair tickled the tip of his pinky finger. Dom resisted the urge to play with it.  
  
"Well, it's a lot like New Zealand, actually. Really beautiful: mountains, beaches, surfing, forests. The weather's nice all the time, but every once in a while it snows so you can go skiing, or rains so you can stay in and read a book and have a nooner."  
  
"A nooner?"  
  
"Sex in the middle of the day."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"And you know what else is cool? You can have sex on the beach; the sand has special properties so it won't get into all your, you know, nooks and crannies. And there's free lube dispensers everywhere. In little machines on every corner."  
  
"Are people having sex on every corner in Heaven?"  
  
"They could if they wanted to. Gay sex, too. God wouldn't care. He's -- what do you call it? Pan-sex-u-al." Elijah carefully enunciated each syllable.  
  
"I suppose He'd have to be," Dom mused. "So is that it? What about your other interests?"  
  
"Well, the Beatles play every week-end, and the Pumpkins Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. And they're never sold out. Tuesdays and Thursdays we go to the movies or stay home and play video games."  
  
"Could I have tea with John Lennon?"  
  
"Every Sunday afternoon."  
  
"Would Yoko be there too?"  
  
"Absolutely not. This is Heaven, remember?"  
  
"But what if you don't die until you're 90? Lube dispensers on every corner aren't going to do you much good then," Dom pointed out.  
  
"Yeah, well, if I'm 90, _you'll_ be 94, don't forget."  
  
"Oh, _that_ won't be a problem," Dom smirked.  
  
"Yeah, _right,_ " Elijah snorted. He considered for a moment, "But now that you mention it, I think we'll have the bodies we have today. I'm pretty happy with the current situation."  
  
"Yeah. Me too."  
  
"Even though we _are_ short."   
  
"Yeah, well there's worse things. And you're shorter," Dom added, as if that made a difference. Which it did. Dom rolled onto his back, and stared at the ceiling with Elijah.  
  
"Know what, Lij? Sounds to me like you're describing what we have now: a home in New Zealand, lots of sex with our current bodies, music, video games. The sand thing isn't a big deal for me." He smiled to himself at the memory of a day when Elijah had been quite happy with the way he had helped him out with the sand in his "nooks and crannies."  
  
Elijah turned to face Dom. "Maybe you're right. That's a nice thought, isn't it? Maybe we _do_ have Heaven today." Elijah paused to consider this concept. "But you know what? There _is_ one thing I'd change."   
  
"What, love?"  
  
"In Heaven, I'd have good vision."  
  
"Good vision?  
  
"Yeah. I want to wake up in the morning a nd be able to open my eyes and see you. Just see you: no contact lenses, no glasses. Crystal clear Dommie -- every line, every whisker, every freckle. The moment I wake up: Dom, in all his clear, in-focus glory." He touched his favorite freckle on Dom's neck. He could just make out its blurry contours in the dim bedroom light. "Yeah," he sighed, "Perfect vision."  
  
Dom didn't know what to say to that. He had often pondered the irony: the most beautiful eyes known to man, but he couldn't see worth a shit with them.  
  
"Lij?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"If you let me be reincarnated, I could come back as your optometrist," Dom suggested, hopefully.  
  
"But you don't control who you come back as, do you?"  
  
"Well, no," Dom admitted. "But then that also means there's a chance you could come back as a person with good eyesight."  
  
"But you can't know that'll happen for sure, can you? And so what if I have perfect vision? What would that matter if we couldn't even find each other? What if you came back as a Tibetan sheepherder and I came back as a Vegas showgirl? Hmm? How would _that_ work?"  
  
Dom tried not to laugh at Elijah's example, as he seemed to be serious. "Well, we found each other this time, didn't we? A working class git from Manchester and a Hollywood movie star. What were the odds of that?"  
  
"Not as high as the sheepherder/showgirl thing."  
  
"We're all one, Lij. We'll find each other. That's what soulmates do," Dom responded confidently. "And then think what fun we'll have! A whole new different kind of fun. Sheepherder/showgirl fun. In your Heaven, we'd keep having the same kind of fun over and over again. With reincarnation, it's different every time."  
  
"Does it ever stop? I can't see myself reincarnating forever." This was a good sign, Dom thought. Elijah was beginning to be able to see himself reincarnating for a limited time, at least.  
  
"Well, when our souls have had enough experiences, we can go the Astral Plane. That's kind of like Heaven."  
  
"Are there lube machines on the Astral Plane?" Elijah asked.  
  
"There could be. If you wanted."  
  
"I suppose Lennon will be there."   
  
"Oh, totally, Lij. I didn't want to say anything before, but frankly, I don't think he would be caught dead in Heaven."  
  
Elijah thought about how happy Dom would be if he could come back a few more times. Dom always craved new experiences. The fact was, even if this was his only life, it was good enough for Elijah; hell, he was only 22, but he felt like he had already lived several lifetimes just in the course of this one. But if the next few lifetimes involved Dom in some way, then maybe it wouldn't be so bad. And the Astral Plane sounded like a reasonable substitute for Heaven.  
  
"Okay. Reincarnation it is."   
  
"But what about your eyesight?" Dom asked, surprised at Elijah's easy acquiescence.  
  
"Guess I'll take my chances. Worked out okay this time even without it. And I'm sure things'll get straightened out on the Astral Plane. Bet I'll be able to see for miles from there."  
  
"Oh yeah. The view's beautiful I hear."  
  
"Good. Glad _that's_ taken care of." Elijah raised himself up on one elbow and ran his finger along the line of Dom's jaw. "You know, the view's pretty good from here, too. Kind of blurry, but pretty good."


End file.
